Relating by Not Fitting In
I sounded like a broken record, repeating the same story over and over again. But even though the story didn’t necessarily change the audience did so it was worth telling.
For a few months the talk of my mega-travel summer to compete in running and riding races in Colorado would percolate in conversation. While I told the story many times I don’t believe I met anyone that wanted to change places with me! I was uniquely me in trying to pull this off and while others wished me well and even prayed for me, I don’t think anyone wanted to do what I was going to attempt to do. I was an outlier, a pioneer, a unique middle-aged man doing something highly unusual in the land that I call home.
Fast forward to the starting line of these races and I found myself with a bunch of other crazies. As unique and perhaps odd as I was back home, I was just another face in the crowd at these races. It was wild to look around and see so many people that looked oddly the same. We had all somehow conformed to the competition!
It’s actually not hard to be a conformist. Leading up to the big mountain bike race I dabbled listening to the podcast devoted solely to this race. It has thousands of listeners and takes the audience behind the scenes and super in-depth with preparation for this potential life-changing race. A listener can really geek out on gear, tactics, how to have friends and family support them, and even where to go to eat afterwards!
All of this info comes from experiences and the latest data surrounding the sport. It also serves as a way to get many to conform to what is perceived as the “right” way to race.
I admit, I kind of fell into that trap as well. Maybe it’s not a trap per se, but it’s pretty convincingly comfortable to know that picking the same tires, having the same hydration pack, and eating the same nutritional items as everyone else will get me to the finish fast.
At the starting line I looked around and sure enough, I was there with many of the same items. We were cycling conformists! And then I thought of all the people that I explained my race to in the months prior and how little they knew or could understand the nuances and gear of this sport. They only knew the distance and the physical toll it would take to finish…and they could barely fathom that!
Truth be told I couldn’t tell you if I needed any of the special gear, specific food, or even a rock-solid support plan. Really, I just needed a bike and a desire to ride it a lot that day. The comfort of conformity might have helped me feel like I was ready but it’s certainly not a guarantee for a finish. And as I found out that day there were opportunities and situations that no one would ever be prepared for; but having a bike and desire to ride allowed me to make memories and eventually get to the finish with stories and satisfaction.
All of this cycling conformity talk made me think of following Jesus. There is definitely a tendency to conform in order to feel comfortable; just the way I felt at the starting line looking at a bunch of other cyclists that looked and prepared just like me. I would argue that the only conformity we all need is to conform to following Him. We are made in his image and likeness, not the world we live in. That’s difficult, especially when we want to know we are accepted by others, fit in, or want to know the outcome before we start something!
Sometimes I find myself seeking conformity in anything else first. The pursuit of conformity can kind of be comforting! Conformity can be found in a whole slew of things. There’s comfort in conformity with politics, football teams, and even attending the same building for church, school, or as employment. But to truly follow Jesus means conforming to Him and His will for you. Everything else flows from that.
Once I made it back home and started recounting the story of our adventures I realized how conformity at the starting line meant nothing to the people I was talking to. They couldn’t relate to tire psi or how many grams of carbs I was eating to pedal over mountain peaks. They wanted a version of the story they could relate to or perhaps be inspired by. Did you know you can be part of a community and not necessarily experience conformity?
This is how Jesus wants us to share Him…preach by experiences and actions on a level that people can understand and be encouraged by. It points others to Jesus for a personal relationship first. From there our hearts are conformed to His and we may never feel like we belong or fit into the world we are asked to live in each day…and that’s ok!
